https://secureservercdn.net/18.104.22.168/z87.afd.myftpupload.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/04/logo-tac-cali-sm-2.png 0 0 Cali Estes https://secureservercdn.net/22.214.171.124/z87.afd.myftpupload.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/04/logo-tac-cali-sm-2.png Cali Estes2019-05-13 17:08:002019-05-13 17:08:00What causes failure to launch?
Up until last year, failure to launch syndrome was looked at as nothing more than laziness and our young adult children or nothing more than a minor personality and motivational defect in our young adult children. But now that more light has been shed on the lack of motivation in our millennials and the inability in our young adult children to be responsible members of society we now need to look at the causes of failure to launch syndrome in our youth. We cannot fix failure to launch syndrome until we know why our young adult children are suffering from failure to launch syndrome. It has become extremely important to zero in on our parenting methods involved in the upbringing of those of us afflicted with failure to launch syndrome.
There are two major defective parenting methods that are the leading cause of failure to launch syndrome. First, we have helicopter parenting which is when we as parents hover over our children, especially in educational, social and occupational life scenarios to attempt to push the child in a direction that we as parents think is best. This is extremely detrimental and the child’s progression in life when it comes to forming their own healthy personality and confidence. The other detrimental form of parenting is snowplow parenting. This form of parenting is when we as parents remove every possible roadblock or hurdle in life for our children as if we were a snow plow going down a snow filled road, removing any obstacle in our way. This is obviously detrimental to our children because they never develop the skill of overcoming life’s negative obstacles.
Second, a young adult has a lack of purpose in life and has no passion or marketable skills. They want to save the world and make a ton of money but want to start their day at noon and spend it on facebook taking selfies. They have no concept of real hard work and think they can simply be Kim Kardashian and make money on youtube.
Third, the lack of social consequences. Mom and dad bail out their adult child, especially all legal issues and make them simply disappear. There is really no consequence, if the child can’t pay rent, mom and dad cover it. If the child wants a car mom and dad buy it.
Fourth, the school has never cut them so they do not know what it is like to be cut from the team or felt a letdown. They graduate school and literally apply to one job and expect to get it and make six figures out of high school. when they don’t get the job they are devastated. They have no idea what loss is.
I will use my own personal experience here but explaining this. My father and I had an extraordinarily good relationship as I was growing up as a child and playing sports and thriving and sports. When I turned 16, I decided to forgo a college scholarship in baseball to pursue my lifelong dream of becoming a touring rock ‘n’ roll drummer. My father turned his back on me and wanted nothing to do with me because he feared I was throwing my life down the toilet. This breach in our relationship contributed to me “shutting down” and becoming extremely “nonproductive” in life! So as you can see there are many different causes when it comes to the causes of failure to launch syndrome and we have to be very careful in the parenting of our youth as well as our relationships with our parents and children.
If you feel as though you are suffering from failure to launch central or maybe you feel as though your parenting skills have led to your child suffering from failure to launch syndrome then please contact us here at https://fixfailure2launch.com or call 1-800-706-0318. Call us today 24 hours a day seven days a week as Dr. Cali Estes, the founder, and creator of The Addictions Coach and The Addictions Academy is here with her new creation geared to help ALL affected by Failure to Launch Syndrome!