HELICOPTERS, SNOWPLOWS, CUPCAKES and BUTTERFLIES!

 

There is an old saying that claims that “perception is reality”.  This is definitely true when it comes to parenting our children. Whether it is how we perceive how they should be brought up and parented or whether it’s how our children perceive life and how they are being brought up. We as parents can hover over our children and correct them at every turn, make decisions for them or basically live their life for them without giving them a chance to develop a healthy personality for themselves and gain a healthy confidence in life.

This hovering that parents do is called helicopter parenting. Helicopter parenting has an adverse effect on our children by stifling their confidence, dulling their social skills and keeps them from figuring life out on their own. There is nothing wrong with healthy guidance when it comes to raising our children and teaching them right from wrong. But flat out hovering and meddling in their lives because your perception of life is a certain way is extremely harmful to our children and can cause failure to launch syndrome as well as addictions, personality defects and other social deficiencies.

For those of us who have raised children from birth, I’m going to ask you if you remember when our children first learned how to walk and we would be right there behind them picking up sharp objects on the floor, slippery items, chairs and brooms, or anything else that they could trip and fall and hurt themselves on. Well, when we hypothetically “run behind” our adult children  clearing them a path through life by eliminating all obstacles that they may have to face or work through themselves, this is called snowplow parenting.

This style of parenting is extremely harmful to our children because they never learn how to work through an obstacle themselves. This style of parenting teaches our adult children that they don’t have to work through life‘s problems, issues and obstacles. Mommy and daddy will always be there to make it better, but the problem is when mommy and daddy are no longer here whether they have passed away or life takes you in separate directions, the adult child is left without a clue on how to work through life’s troublesome obstacles.

My wife tells me that life isn’t always “cupcakes and butterflies”.

You see, I was a child whose parents both used snowplow parenting and helicopter parenting when I was a child and it has definitely crippled me in my adult life when it comes to working through life‘s little issues. And what my wife is trying to tell me is that through helicopter parenting and snowplow parenting, our parents try to give us the perception that life is always good. Life is always full of cupcakes and butterflies! This could not be further from the truth and the reality of life is that there are always going to be obstacles and issues that we have to deal with on a tactful and responsible level.

 

So, if you are a product of helicopter parenting or snowplow parenting which has contributed to your failure to launch syndrome please read the information from Dr. Cali Estes or call the elite team at 1.800.706.0318. This is a unique and one-of-a-kind platform to deal with failure to launch and all of its negative consequences that Dr. Estes has created and it gives you the option to have the help brought to you into the comfort of your home instead of coming to us.  Call today and begin your journey back to a responsible and productive lifestyle!